Oh, and... Patrick likes Lisa Best!

So, while Baby Rick likes to make me throw up on a regular basis still, while he likes to step on my bladder in the middle of an important teaching moment, while he keeps me up all night with his over-active antics... Do you know what he does to Lisa? He follows her voice around my belly! If she talks, he starts moving. If she speaks to the left side of my belly, he moves to that side. If she then speaks to the right side of my belly, he moves to that side. He's been doing this for about a week now, I think. Lisa can lead him around my belly like she has him on a leash! He loves her! And he doesn't make her throw up or anything. Well, he does make her go to McDonalds against her will, but he doesn't make her eat it, just buy it.

I'm pretty sure that Patrick likes Lisa best. I'm not sure how I feel about this.

Having a Baby is Kind of Like Farming, Right?

As you all know by now, I have struggled to find appropriate maternity wear, and by appropriate, I mean appropriate for me. My friend Kat pointed out in a very clear and easy to accept way that maternity has a style of its own and it has no concern for your personal aesthetic or personality. Pregnancy is its own aesthetic, she says. I can see that, and more importantly, I can live with that. So, I have decided, when the time comes, I will suck it up and by the pseudo butch maternity pants that so many of you have recommended at Old Navy and the like. I will also look into the bella band and maybe see if I can talk the kids in the costume shop to sew some elastic panels on my recently purchased $10 Kmart men's jeans.

For now, however, I remain stubbornly attached to my own butch aesthetic. Lisa took me out about two weeks ago and bought me a couple of pairs of really big jeans, button-down shirts (with snaps, which I love!), and suspenders. We didn't try them on all together before we left Kmart. I just made sure the jeans fit and the suspenders were comfortable and we went home. Once home, I got dressed to go to rehearsal and... surprise, surprise... I have put a whole new spin on the maternity aesthetic!
I look like a damn farmer, but a damn cute farmer according to Lisa. (My head and hair aren't really that big. It's just a shadow.) The suspenders work well, and the clothes are really comfortable. That is important since I am growing like crazy right now--see, the farmer look makes sense. I'm growing something. Also, Baby Rick is kicking like crazy (I don't know if it was all the men's gymnastics I watched this summer or the musical theatre auditions I watched just as he started moving, but this baby can't sit still. I like that about him.) so I need some extra room in the belly to accomodate the movement. Anyway, the clothes are working, but I definitely look less like a pregnant lady who is entitled to throw up in the women's bathroom and far more like a beer-bellied, dirty old man who might be the last person you should let in a woman's bathroom. Fortunately, I spend a lot of time in the theatre department these days where people are far less worried about such details.

As for all the time I am spending in the theatre department right now: the chair of our department, Bob, is directing a play called Psychopathia Sexualis. Bob hasn't been feeling so hot lately so he asked me to help out. One thing led to another and now I am doing rehearsals pretty much every day. And, I must say, I am loving it. I am exhausted but it is fun and Baby Rick seems to like it too. He starts kicking hard at all the right times. I think he has already developed a keen sense of camp humor (that's our boy).

Lisa has been a real trooper, too. She brings me food at rehearsal whenever I want her to--and since I never know when Rick's going to be hungry, Lisa maybe hitting the road any time from 6-10. Unfortunately for Lisa and me Rick still rejects most foods, but he really likes $1 cheeseburgers from McDonalds. I hate McDonalds and Lisa can't even stand the smell of it. But Lisa heads to McDonalds multiple times a week and brings me a cheeseburger anyway. Sometimes she stays and watches rehearsal for a bit, too. It has become a real family affair. That's one of the good things about McDonalds, I get to see Lisa even though I am always at work. The other good thing is that I have finally put on a few more pounds so the mid-wives are encouraging my occassional McDonalds trips. Go figure.

Well, that's all for now. I must return to grading and working on the play and watching football.

The Annual Relocation and an Update on Pants

It seems every year we move. And that is what we are up to right now. I would like to say that we won't be moving next year this time, but I'm sure we will. We are really only moving this year to be closer to work for Baby Rick's impending arrival. Next year we may move back to Philly, who knows.

Anyway, the move is no big thing this time since we had to hire movers (me being pregnant and Lisa being back challenged). The great thing about moving when you are pregnant is that you get to be a slacker the whole time. The rotten thing about moving when you are pregnant is that you Have to be a slacker the whole time. The packing process is going amazingly slow.

The other advantage for ME of moving when pregnant is that I don't have to worry about what I am wearing. Who cares if I wear a wife beater and dirty, baggy shorts all day. Lisa thinks I'm beautifully pregnant no matter what I do. And I only leave the house to look for boxes at places where people just don't care. So, I haven't had to worry about the clothes issue at all and I won't have to worry for at least another week. But I have gotten some good advice since the last posts. For example (because I know there are some very interested parties out there): don't count on overalls because you may inadvertently wet your pants in the last trimester. It might be cheaper to buy cheap men's pants and have them tailored with elastic stuff. Or, courtesy of Ann "Boo" Hamada and Kevin Aptowicz--the Bella Band (http://www.ingridandisabel.com/bellaband.html). You just leave your pants un-buttoned and put this elastic band over your pants and they stay on. Or, you buy baggy pants and the band keeps them from falling down. Also, many folks have insisted that I will have to suck it up and wear maternity pants in the last weeks. The best options people have suggested for least-girly-maternity wear has been Old Navy. That will have to do if worst comes to worst.

So, for now, I will stick with my loose fitting men's shorts. Next I will wear loose fitting men's pants. Then I will get a Bella Band and either have men's pants tailored or buy some Old Navy pants.

Here's to Pants!

And, please, help me hold this over Rick's head in his teen years when he is putting his mommies through hell. Tell him, "Rick, your Mommy Liz wore lady's pants for you! Show her the respect she has earned!"

Denim Does Not Butch Make

This is Rick and me on our front porch in Philly (Rick's the one in the middle and Mommy Lisa is taking the picture). I don't think this picture quite does justice to just how pregnant I look, especially for those of you who are used to seeing me with a big belly anyway. In fact, this may just look like I developed a chicken neck for no reason, but, alas, there is a baby in there.
As it is summer right now, I am getting away with wearing whatever fits. In a few weeks I will be teaching again and it will be time to dress normal--no, Mom, not normal-normal, but normal-for-me-normal. Hence the title of this blog. What will I wear.
I have very much appreciated all of the helpful suggestions on what to do for maternity wear and where to go to find it; however, folks, just because it is denim and doesn't have a floral print does not mean it is masculine--at least, not masculine by butch dyke standards. See, here's the thing with being a butch dyke (and, for those of you who don't know, I am not insulting myself by calling myself a butch dyke. I am quite proud of who I am and am perfectly comfortable with the label. But don't you dare call me that unless you say it with love... or total admiration, like Lisa does)... Anyhoo, the thing with being a butch dyke is this: we don't simply where masculine women's clothes, we wear--generally speaking--men's clothes. And we don't dress to look like men, we dress to look like ourselves, butch dykes (though sometimes we do dress to look like men, but then we typically refer to ourselves as something other than butch dykes in those moments). Now, a great disadvantage for many a butch dyke is that her body type does not easily fit the way men's clothes are cut. Hence, the fashionably wise butch dyke wears her clothes a little loose as opposed to wearing them too tight (Too tight has the decidedly negative effect of making pants bind at the hips and ride to high on the waist and at the ankle. You end up looking like you don't know how to dress yourself.) For years I was really over weight, so I was lucky to find clothes that fit at all. After I lost the weight, I had no hips, no breasts, and not much of an ass either. So once I figured out what size clothes to wear, I did okay. It just took me a bit to figure out why my pants needed to be considerably longer than I was used to (my stomach wasn't in the way anymore). I could wear what I wanted and find what I wanted just about anywhere I wanted. I could dress just like the butch dyke I love to be.
Now, that I am pregnant, however, I am in trouble. So far I have been wearing looser pants and not buttoning my shirts up with an undershirt underneath. As my belly grows, and grows, this will not be an option. My belly is already starting to push my pants down when I'm not looking. The other day, my hands were full as I was walking to the house and I had no choice but to let my pants drop to my ankles and hope no one saw. At least I didn't trip.
So, I need to figure out what to wear this fall semester while I am teaching. I do not want to wear women's clothes--though, I hear I may have no choice on this matter once I hit the 8th month. I never try to dress fancy to teach, so that isn't a concern, but I don't want to wear the same pair of overalls everyday--though, that idea does sound appealing. I've never been cool, so that's not a concern either. I just want to be dressed and remain ME while do it. Is that too much to ask? No, really, is it? I need to know.
I'm in a bind folks. Suggestions would be great. But, remember, Denim does not butch make. Please don't try and convince me that the loose cut jeans in Target's maternity department are manly. I checked. They aren't. At least, not by my standards. Besides, when I am in the maternity department, people stare at me and start looking around like Oprah's camera crew will appear at any moment.

Okay, Okay

Lisa says I have to stop playing around. Our little one is Patrick Ross Ruchti. We will call him Rick for short after Lisa's dad. And he's a hoot already. He likes to make me puke at inopportune times, just for kicks and giggles. And very cooperative when it comes to working with technicians and mid-wives, but not so cooperative when it comes to working around my teaching schedule. He also likes banana milk shakes--of course he doesn't care that his carrying mom is lactose intolerant--and pickles--no, he doesn't care that he is turning his carrying mom into a raging stereotype.... I mean, a different raging stereotype than the stereotype she already is.

Speaking of raging stereotypes... How am I supposed to find maternity wear--oh, and that is day is soon upon us--when everyone's idea of masculine maternity wear boils down to anything in denim or without lace! My next important blog must be on the perils of maternity clothes shopping for the masculinely inclined expectant mom. (With all the old men with sagging bellies out there, one would think there would be readily accessible butch maternity wear, but alas...)

We Caved

So, we changed our minds about finding out the sex of the baby. We found it out. You know, part of me feels like we wimped out and ruined the surprise, but we are having so much fun now calling the baby by name instead of It, Parasite, Pukey McPukinstein, or any of the other names we had for it. (Of course, I still use those names sometimes. They just fit.)

Anyhooo... As exciting as finding out the sex was, the most exciting part was when the tech--the best tech ever, by the way--flipped the screen around so Lisa and I could see it together to show us our baby holding up a pointy finger as if to say, "And one more thing..." Looked just like me. I was quite proud. We are going to have a bossy, know-it-all of a baby. That will be the Ruchti side of the family's contribution.

I am not normally a fan of sharing ultrasound photos, but that one kicks ass. I am going to scan it sometime soon and put it on the blog. It's so funny, and the hand looks huge next to the tiny head. (Hmmm... I wonder what that tells us about our baby.)

I also need to get a picture of me on this thing because I'm finally starting to look clearly pregnant (I'd like to see them kick me out of the women's bathroom now!). So, yeah, my stomach is huge and looks really funny next to my scrawny chicken legs.

More later!

Something to Blog About

Honestly, we have had a lot of things to blog about over the last couple of months, but I have been very neglectful. I have lots of excuses, but I will skip all of those for now to share something very exciting: Lisa and I just felt the baby move! 17 weeks pregnant and that little one is already trying to get out. You go kid!
Anyway, we were out getting a sugar-free milk shake, which Lisa generously takes me out for regularly on command, and while I was excitedly waiting for the shake to arrive I felt something that felt like weird gas. Then, I felt it in another place, very distinctly. So, I asked Lisa to feel it, and sure enough she felt it. I then wanted to ask the women who had walked up next to us to feel, but Lisa discouraged that. But they figured out what was going on anyway and congratulated us. (That was nice)

I am so excited and happy. In fact, for the first time in weeks I feel giddy about the baby again. Instead of making me throw-up or take a nap, Baby Sheep is tickling me! Isn't that sweet and friendly. I love Baby Sheep.